What
if such a man (or woman) exists among us? A
man who is simply unrepentant. He does not see a need to apologize. He just
can't believe that he has done anything wrong. He is blind to his own faults.
He can't accept that he has hurt others, destroyed their character, marginalized
his colleagues, betrayed his friends, and scapegoated those who trusted him.
He views the world in binary terms,
that is, in black and white, and what is black is the world and what is white
is him and no one else. And if right is as right does, and wrong is as wrong
does, then he is always right and is always doing what is right even when many
would persistently beg to differ and differ most persistently.
If anything, he suffers from a myopia
of the most vexing kind and that is the inability to examine his own heart.
Somehow, he sees not. His reflection in the social mirror is missing something
crucial for one to be humane, understanding, forgiving, self-reproaching,
self-correcting, kind and compassionate.
What is shown to him when he looks in
the mirror is not his own flaws as a human being but the many flaws of others,
innumerable and endless even. So innumerable in fact that his self-protective
mirror conveniently shields his own broken image from sight; very much like an
insidious conspiracy of self in favor of self. And if love covers a multitude of sins,
then pride - in his case - uncovers many but it is the sins of others and never
his to renounce. Never his to disavow, to make amends.
This is a man who holds himself up in
the highest esteem and it is perched so high that even he himself finds it
impossible to reach. Alas, this same conspiracy has mutated into one where self
takes over self and reigns undisputed.
Does
such a man (or woman) exist then?
Does he or she walk among us? Or is this just a character made up in fictions,
fairy tales and science-fantasy? But if truth (or reality) is stranger than
fiction, can anyone then say with an admittedly contrite heart that such a
person actually exists and he thrives in certain circumstances of life. Some of
them even live to a ripe old age, insulated from penury, sickness and blame.
And apart from certified psychopaths,
or the mentally disturbed, how does clinical psychiatrists or the DSM-V characterize
this peculiar personality type?
Here is a confession by a successful law
professor for your digest:
“Remorse
is alien to me. I have a penchant for deceit. I am generally free of entangling
and irrational emotions. I am strategic and canny, intelligent and confident…Yet
I am not motivated or constrained by the same things that most good people are…(As
a child), I envisioned the people in my life as robots that turned off when I
wasn’t directly interacting with them…I have never killed anyone, but I have
certainly wanted to. I may have a disorder, but I am not crazy. In a world
filled with gloomy, mediocre nothings populating a go-nowhere rat race, people
are attracted to my exceptionalism like moths to a flame.” (“Confession of
a Sociopath” - M.E. Thomas).
Now, to be fair, none of us are
spared corruption. Even for those who do not subscribe to the
religiously-loaded concept of the original sin, history has shown us what we
are capable of. The combustible mix of extreme religion and self-preservation
has exposed us to the most horrid chapters in history. Wars fought for land, prestige
and power have been our heritage since the beginning of time. Our
struggles are tainted by blood, slavery and massacres. On a personal scale, we are at times ruled by deceit, lust, envy, hatred, arrogance, apathy, revenge, sadism, recklessness, indolence and pride.
No one can whitewash our history of human savagery unless
we start all over with a Noah-like annihilation of sorts and a
self-administered amnesia jab to leave our sordid past behind for good. Good luck hoping the second time over will be better. But my
point is not about the savagery of humanity - that much is undeniable. My point
is about our redemption - for as insane is our cruelty, equally empowering is our indomitable conscience and free-will to save us from a point of no return.
With every evil raised to the fort,
the good in us also rises to meet the challenge. And such good and evil can
co-exist in one lifetime with good ultimately triumph. However, this Manichean struggle
of good versus evil will be endless because love's prodigal is hate, and light's blind
spot is darkness.
Yet,
are there those who simply defy this human leaning towards eventual redemption? And if the arc of history is bent towards justice, then for this
rare group, is it bent towards impenitence, unforgiveness, and bitterness?
It is said that one should judge not
lest ye be judged. But what if such a person exists regardless of whether he is
being judged or not? Worse still, what if it is our silence or goodwill or
compassion that we unwittingly extend over and over again to them that aids
them in perpetuating their agenda? In the same way that I dread that such
people should exist and thrive in the world that I live in, my fear is that the
far-sobering reality is never held a hostage to my wishful thinking or
religiously-manicured sensibilities.
The world is the way it is because it
can't be anything else.
I can surely wish that I am wrong about the existence
of such people but I can't wish that if I am wrong (that is, they do exist),
they would be redeemable. The glaring reality of this rapacious world just
doesn't offer me that luxury. In other words, my idealism can only inspire me
from within to hope for the best in mankind, but that will not change the existence
of such rare breed of people whose deathbed's regret is that they have not done
enough to crush their enemies, exterminate their opposition, exploit the ones
who love them unconditionally, or amass enough power and wealth at the expense
of those they deemed dimwitted enough to part with their life's savings,
devotion and trust.
For such people, the tolls and trails
of the misfortune, misery and suffering they leave behind is just not long
enough. And if Hitler, Stalin, Idi Amin, Kim Jong II and Pol Pot, to name
just a few, are historical tyrants to go by, then I guess the only hope I have
is twofold: First, that their murderous exploits in this world would be short-lived;
and second, that I should always guard my own heart, for out of it flows the
issues of life - both good and evil. Cheerz.
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