There is one struggle in life that nature always wins, eventually: it’s our struggle with death. That day will come. Our time on earth will soon expire, very much like the last grain of sand falling from the upper half of the hour glass.
Today’s article is written by Dr William Wan, general secretary of the Singapore Kindness Movement. It’s entitled “Investing in things that matter to me has been my best decision.”
His wife, of 50 yrs, described him as a “low maintenance husband”. And that is partly because William is one who distinguishes needs and wants. He doesn’t allow the latter (wants) to dictate the former (needs). For I believe he understands that our wants are quite endless, and envy digs a bottomless pit for it.
So, most of our strivings for the accumulation of wealth done in the shadow of our mortality seldom brings enduring satisfaction because they can’t fill the void we so much want to fill when our end eventually beckons.
Reading William’s intimate sharing, I feel that this practical existential policy of the heart serves the general populace best. This is how he puts it: -
“In a sense, I practise “impactful investment”, except that it is my life that I am investing in. In my own faith tradition, I see my existence as a stewardship - I do not own my life.””
“Neither do I own anything that I have. I am only a trustee to make myself and what I am entrusted with useful. I give as I live, believing that what I have is only truly mine when I am able to make it useful to those who need it.”
“So, I live to the fullest, giving myself to do the things I am passionate about and living within or below, but never beyond my means.”
I guess everyone has his or her definition of what living to the fullest means. It really depends on the stage of life you are in, and what you have created for yourself.
I don’t expect the young, who has a lot of sand in the upper case of their hour glass, to fret too much over their earthly lease on earth. One look at them and you know death is the least of a bother in their mind.
Thus, at that stage, I would expect them to be goal-driven, to live responsibly, to be accountable to the people they love, to keep their promises, especially their marital vows, and to always be mindful of the many trade-offs in life; some of which at the expense of their health, and others, their relationships.
And keeping a conscious tab on all that is what I would consider for them as living to their fullest at that stage of their lives.
As for those who are doing well, raking in the cash, building their empire, that is what they have created for themselves. I guess wealth is not meaningless after all, at least to a certain extent. For you create jobs for people, so that they can feed their own families. You contribute to society with your innovation, enterprises and taxes. You inspire others to model after you. That can’t be existentially morbid right?
Nevertheless, regardless of your stage or what you have created for yourself, I believe the faith tradition that William speaks about, that is, “I see my existence as a stewardship - I do not own my life”, is the safest stake you can place on the roulette table of life, where there is always an element of unknown (and risk) in everything you do.
And one would do well to bear this in mind: it is not improbable that today or this week may be your last on earth. Neither be smug about what you have accumulated for show, since they can be wiped out as fortune turns unexpectedly, or when you pass on eventually.
Indeed, we must never forget that fairness in life does not depend on how fast the sand empties itself in the upper chamber, but it is in what each drop means to us, and how, like William said, it impact others.
And ownership and wealth are nothing but social concepts the mind preoccupies (or obsesses) itself with. In some ways, the rich and famous are so because we see them as such. We often pay them the attention they normally do not deserve, or desire.
We therefore think things into existence, the good and the bad, and make them our reality. Our mind thus makes it to be so, even when it is far from the truth we ought to embrace. For example, envy embitters us because we cannot let go of the comparison, which is based on how we see ourselves as against others, that is, with what they own and what we don’t.
That is why when William talks about stewardship, it is about letting go, not holding on. It is about trusteeship, about being trustworthy, rather than ownership, which tends to meld our identity with the things we lay claim on. Alas, there is nothing that shortchanges us more in life than to reduce all relationships into dollar and cents, thereby measuring our worth against an economic ruler.
In the end, it is not how lavish our tombstone is that measures how well we have lived our life. For a well-lived life is, as William puts it, one where he or she, at their deathbed, is able to proclaim this with unreserved conviction: “I give as I live, believing that what I have is only truly mine when I am able to make it useful to those who need it.”
And that is the ultimate purpose that our life ought to move towards, before it comes to an end.
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