YA Retreat: Identity.

I was at a leaders’ retreat for young adult (YA) over the weekend. We gathered to chart the course for next year and to bond with one another. 

It started with a bike ride at Pulau Ubin on Friday afternoon, a cosy peranakan dinner, an intense discussion at night, morning breakfast thereafter, and another round of discussion followed by lunch at the famous Changi Village’s nasi lemak stall, and after that, we were home bound. 

Unavoidably, the word we were trying to grapple with was “identity”. What is our identity in the YA? 

Well, I will not go into the details of what was discussed, but let’s just say that on paper, it was not too difficult to put identity into words. 

But we wanted to go much deeper, to put words into action. That is, to make it real, impactful and meaningful to and for every young adult so that they may take ownership and embrace it, and in turn be inspired by. 

Call me old fashioned, but I believe symbolism and meta-narrative still matter in a world of fake news, postmodernist truths and individual expressionism. 

Take light for example. The image that comes to mind is a light bulb, a torchlight, a campfire or the rising sun. I can also think about a long, dark tunnel with a light at the end.

Undoubtedly, those images inspire deeply for those struggling in their own trial. It speaks of hope, end of pain, and eventual overcoming for those who are never weary in well-doing for in due season a harvest awaits. 

But there is still a palpable gap to bridge between light on paper and light in action or application. 

Being the light of Christ, salt and light, and a city on the hill are powerful metaphors, but how do we get the young adults to embody those powerful and timeless truths in the life they are living day by day, year by year? 

And the reality is, how do we as leaders be inspired and empowered by what is written on pulp paper when we ourselves are at times jaded, divided and distracted? 

In our discussion, we threw out many questions, and many definitions of identity in a youth adult ministry. Honestly, in the end, it was a fruitful discussion not so much that we have nailed what identity meant to us in a general consensus. 

The truth is, we didn’t nail it. In our intense discussion, we did not come up with anything that is new or novel under the sun. But I believe that while there is nothing new under the sun, there is a lot of “old things” we do not know with enough depth. 

I also believe that familiarity may breed contempt, but I can expect nothing less than contempt if we are only familiar with it and are never deeply convicted by it. For, yes, familiarity may breed contempt, yet conviction breeds transformation, and transformation however long it takes reaps a life worth living for Christ. 

So, what is our identity as a young adult ministry? 

As I had written above, each of us was invited to offer one practical definition of identity and the usual familiar words came up. To the skeptic, it may appear to be a hot tubbing session of devising grand idealism. But let me address that by saying this, our contributions converge rather dynamically, organically and spontaneously on one word, love. 

However much we wanted to eke out a definition with a “wow!” factor, we ended up with...waitforit...love.

In essence, in our brainstorming, we could not escape from what Jesus once said when he was asked about the greatest commandment. There are only two: “Love Him with all your heart, soul, and mind” and “love your neighbor as yourself”.

Well, apart from the two greatest commandments, love exists only in vain ideology, grand idealism and self-serving postmodernist values. 

Alas, you can reinvent the wheel for some things, like putting seats at the periphery and it becomes a Ferris wheel. Or assigning numbers and multiple slots and it becomes a roulette wheel. 

But you can’t reinvent the wholeness of love because it is not measured by numbers assigned or seats attached. It is however measured by the distance you travel with it, and I know of one man who once went all the way with and for love. He made all the difference. He did not reinvent love in the way we wanted it, but he embodied and lived it out in a journey that has transformed many lives.

Mind you, love is a simple word, mundane to many, too familiar to some, and even viewed as hypocritically offensive to others. But as the saying goes, “fish is the last to discover water”, so it is with love when we take it for granted or treat it as an inconvenient truth, setting timeless standards our fleshly desires naturally rebel against.

But say or feel what you like, take water out of the ocean and all the fishes will die. Same here with love. Drain it out of our lives and we will destroy one another eventually. With love, all are elevated. Without it, no one stands in the end. 

So, let me wrap up with what I felt was a good definition of our YA identity. It was offered by a pastor. He said: “A blazelighter (young adult) is one who experiences the bountiful love of God and boldly expresses this love within and without the community.” 

And yes, ultimately, the challenge is this, is that too familiar to us, or are we truly convicted by it? 

For if it is the latter, we can indeed do all things through Christ.