Wednesday, 5 November 2014

17 ways we have made God in our own image

17 ways we are more sure than not that we have fashioned God in our own image:-
1) When god hates the same people we hate and loves the same people we love.
2) When god uncannily endorses every biblical exegesis, dreams and vision that we come up with.
3) When god reveals self-serving revelation to us to the exclusion of all.

4) When god bends over backward to bless our pet project and shows unreserved wrath against project we happen to find not god pleasing.
5) When god somehow gives us the peace that surpasses all understanding when we condemn a particular group of sinners to hell and blame them for the cause of wars, epidemic, natural disasters and global warming.

6) When god tells us exactly when his second coming will be, and if that date should come and go uneventfully, to remind us that it is about the season and not the exact date - but that somehow never stops him from telling us the exact date at a later date.
7) When god wants us to be rich through the financial sacrifices of our congregation without sacrificing too much financially on our part.

8) When god's grace forgives everything without any need to seek repentance ever or at all.
9) When we believe that when god saves us, we are deemed always saved, and even when we hypothetically die a staunch atheist, we still insist that we are saved by default or whether we like it or not.
10) When god takes us on an exclusive tour to hell often and tells us to spread the message of eternal condemnation to all unbelievers to instill fear and
 panic in them.
11) When we know for sure the will of god even before his will is revealed and when the same is revealed via whatever convenient personal means, it happens to coincide perfectly with what we have always wanted to do in the first place.
12) When god apologizes to us for the heresy that we are so sure is right.
13) When we claim we have the
 favor of the lord when we disown our son for being gay and hope that he will rot in hell for his sins.
14) When we are so sure that god has predestined us for eternal salvation even before our coming into existence; and to be hair-splittingly specific, we ineluctably believe we are personally elected and unconsciously judge those against us as not being so elected.
15) When god wants us to be prosperous at all costs, and if we
 are not, the only reason is that we have not believed in him enough.
16) When god promises to answer our prayer without exception and it is never a question of "will he?" but a question of "when".
17) When our succession plan is about electing a successor we claim has found favor with God when it is more often than not that our successor has found favor more with us than with god. Cheerz.

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